Living the Life of an Artist

Yesterday I went back to working on my novel. I’d not written in a couple months, but it did not take me long to get involved. As a matter of fact, the story consumed me all day, so much so that when Ma’s visiting nurse was leaving, I was all mixed up which day of the week it was.

Then this morning, it starts in again. I keep thinking of things to add. I jot down notes as I am trying to get other things done. When I was in the shower, a whole big scenario worked itself out and I was excited, but the minute I got dried off, that whole scene was gone. (The Muse teasing me.) Still, though, other scenes, dialogue, and ideas are rolling off my mind like clouds going by on a windy day. I cannot possibly record it all.

This happens to me, this total involvement in the story. It’s like it takes me over and I can’t stop thinking about it. One of the problems is that it jumps around quickly. A scenario will be running in my head and then logic kicks in to realize that for this to happen something in a previous chapter would have to change to lead up to this moment. Another problem is that in my mind everything moves so fast that there’s no way I can capture it on paper or typing. I have to rein the mind in and that slows some of the creativity.

I am disappointed that my descriptions are lacking. I have no trouble with action and dialogue, but describing people and being able to talk about their clothes are a real issue. I want to talk about this with other writers... the writing process….

I am sooo excited about this story! BUT… and I am ashamed to say… the main character was a minor character in someone else’s story and the world these people live in are from that other author’s fantasy series. I have added new characters and other stories. I don’t feel I have it in me to create new worlds but I absolutely can get into creating new characters and new storylines. Who knows, maybe I can eventually sell this story to that other author.

Because I've not written in awhile, I figured I'd do two today.

Living the Life of an Artist

“When you do art, you submerge yourself into your own reality, your own little world. You place yourself inside what you love about life. When you celebrate that place with discipline, sometimes it shows up and is right there with you.

But when I set aside my art for a few days, it gives me the cold shoulder. It walks away from me until I again show my good intent.”   ----excerpt from Heron Dance, Reflections of a Wild Artist.

I often experience this and call it my belief about the Muse. When She comes and I pay attention, the creativity runs rampant and I am filled with joy and excitement at what I’m accomplishing. 

If I am busy and don’t take the time for the Muse, She goes away and might not come back for awhile. I am left feeling like I’ve disappointed Her. Once in awhile, She’s even a bit angry at my lack of attention to Her… my Muse has a bit of an attitude. She turns Her back on me leaving me with the feeling that I’ve missed out on something great.

I’m always grateful when She returns and once more our relationship is whole.

Living the Life of an Artist

For a few days, other things throw me off balance and artistic endeavors are sporadic. There are too many irons in the fire and it’s hard to focus on one thing.  Many days go by where I feel I’ve accomplished nothing. Life gets in the way of the art. Responsibilities drag me away from the easel and often my own perceived dilemmas create roadblocks in my mind.

Accomplishing nothing is not a one hundred percent true statement, though. Just because nothing gets finished, doesn’t mean I am not working. Sometimes the steps are very, very small. I can accept that.

And sometimes it’s not that I don’t get anything done; I am not getting art work done in the way I want to be working. If I leave the house to run errands, I am doing something that needs to be done. If I go do an interview, then I am working on an article for the paper. Breakfast with my artist friends is rewarding in that we support one another, plus there is always the opportunity for a photo op somewhere between here and there.

Living the Life of an Artist

            The excerpt from Heron Dance this morning was about courage and faith of artists. He talked about believing in the value of our work and he went on to say ”People pay lots of money for the creations of van Gogh, Picasso, Pollock, because, in part, they are monuments to courage, to belief in oneself. These artists transcended the realities of their lives, they kept at their work, stayed faithful to their vision, despite rejection, despite disappointment. Their works are seen as celebrations of faith in oneself. What makes great artists great in part is that their belief in themselves, in their vision, is great.”

It is all about continuing the work and the belief that what we do IS worth it, that our work has meaning, that others will like it. And there are those times when we can't afford new supplies, so we make do with what we have or we find other ways to be creative. Artists are not always ordinary... Oh, maybe we can seem to be for a little while, but then we fall off the grid of what most people think is a good use of time and how we should be "making money." 

I never considered that the "world looks to artists for courage." It's true, though. We have a lot of courage! Look at what we go through, yes the ridicule, the comments that we can't make a living being an artist, and all that other stuff. Yet, we persevere, we keep creating, even knowing that we seldom ever make the money back that we put into the effort. We don't give up. We find ways to do what makes us satisfied. 

"...Celebrations of faith in oneself..." Wow, even on days when I crash and am discouraged, there is still that faith in myself. I know that I can do this. I KNOW that I am an artist. Maybe that's one of the reasons I leave my work all over the house. When I look up and see those pictures and cards and scarves, I feel good knowing that this is all my work. Even if it's not sold at the moment, I know that at any time it COULD sell. Someone might walk in today and just have to have a drawing or picture. Doing the work IS worth it, even if it's just making me feel happy.

Living the Life of an Artist

Sometimes I try to do too much to a piece and for my technique, that does not work. I attempted to finish four of my drawings the other day and got discouraged with three of them. I walked away with one finished product. It’ll take me days before I can face those others again because, at the moment, I don’t like them very much.

Yesterday, on the small table easels, I attached three more blank sheets carefully torn from a 22x30 sheet. I prefer to work in smaller sizes, usually around 10x6 or smaller. I started two more drawings. The first is a re-do of one that is downstairs on the big easel and the other is from a recent photo of Lake Todd.

The time went by fast. I am trying to adapt my style and go with a “less is more” aspect and even though I use a photo as a guideline, I allow the drawing to take on its own style. Good headway was made and I am pleased with the progress. With the re-do, I am trying to figure out how to add the “hint of color.” I have an idea, but I’m not sure it’s going to work. I might experiment on a piece of scrap paper.

I am happy with yesterday’s work.